Homesick, being stuck in my head, and a quick update

I think this is the first time that I have actually felt homesick in quite a long time. It isn't so much that I miss being in Rochester or that I miss being around things that I grew up with I just miss being comfortable and knowing my way around and being surrounded by people I love. That is what I miss the most! Don't get me wrong I have met good people here and I am happy, it is just hard to realize that I left all of the people I loved and moved hours away from them for a job. My wonderful boyfriend Jason and I have been together for a year now and are starting to talk about what the next steps are and that is really exciting to me. I know that I would have never met him without the move and wouldn't be so happy without him. Many of my coworkers are great people and a lot of fun and I am truly blessed to work with such fun people. I just miss having people close to me who can easily tell when I'm having a bad day, or when I need to talk but don't actually want to (even if I should). It's hard for me to open up, and it's even harder to be willing to meet new people after a year and a half of being here because I'm not sure where to meet them.

A lot of this has been on my mind on top of the fact that I have been fighting a cold and getting ready for midterm exams next week and recuperating from the holidays. School has been busy and a bit stressful just because of the number of snow days we have had and how much we have had to adjust everything because of them. It's been interesting to say the least. Not to mention it feels like everyone has been at each other's throats lately because they aren't agreeing about anything and when anyone is asked to do something else it just gets tense, whether or not it's part of our job anyways! Exam week will be more relaxing and productive, hopefully. 

Christmas and New Years was great! I was in New Jersey for about a week and a half around Christmas which was glorious! I had a great time with family and was able to actually relax. Jason's and I spent New Year's Eve in Philly with a bunch of friends originally from Rochester, now they are spread around the east coast. We had a blast!! It was a lot of fun to be out and to see good friends who I hadn't seen in a long time. Coming back was hard. Luckily we had a few snow days which let us easy back into school, which had its pros and cons. 

In general it's been a great school year and things really are going well. As busy and as stressed as I feel right now I know it is only momentary. It will get better. I know missing home happens from time to time and that I just need a few good hugs and to talk to my parents and to be reminded that this was the right choice for my life. 

End of Summer!

Well the rest of the summer has flown by. I moved, camp has ended, I've gone on a wonderful date with Jason to a winery, and I've been able to meet up with a few friends from high school and college before school starts up next week.

A few weeks ago I moved in with a new friend. We met through Jason and it has been smooth sailing ever since. We found a place quickly, put an application in and were approved within a few days. The move went smoothly, always a lot of work to pack and then unpack, but I'm very happy in our townhouse. We've got a good amount of space to share and it is close to school, Wegmans, friends, and almost everything else we could want!

The end of camp was rough. The kids were good for the most part. They were still having fun, a few lovely behavior issues as always, but it wasn't too bad. The staff I had to work with made for a hard time. Some were very good, and others decided about halfway through the summer to stop all communication and it became very tense and stressful. It was a difficult end to the summer. By the end I really didn't want to go to work and I'm quite sure that I won't do it again full time next summer just so that I can have some sanity.

As a way to relax once camp ended Jason and I did a winery visit and picnic. We went to Miracle Valley Vineyards and it was a beautiful afternoon. We spent time enjoying a nice lunch picnic on the grounds after a delicious wine tasting! I know it's sappy but here is a cute picture of the two of us together.

This week has been great! I have a week and a half off before staff have to be back at school to get ready for students and the year to start. Monday I slept in, relaxed all morning, was slightly productive around the place finishing unpacking and hanging things, and then I got a haircut. I was able to relax again at night. Tuesday I went out to lunch and then it spilled into coffee with one of my best friends from high school. It was awesome to hang out with her, she lives right outside DC and she isn't that far away but we don't get together nearly enough. Tuesday night was Jason and mines 7 months. He made me dinner and we relaxed together. It was a nice, quiet night. Today I was able to get together with a good friend from college who just recently moved to MD and is only about 45 minutes away. I'm so excited to have her closer, and hanging out all afternoon was awesome! Tomorrow I'm splurging and using a Groupon to get my nails done and pamper myself a little bit. Then I have a phone date planned with a good friend from home. Thursday night I'm getting together with some girl friends for drinks before the craziness of school starts. I have another phone date planned with another friend for Friday. It should be a wonderful end to the week. I'm super excited for it. The only downside is that I have to read a book for school, but it is short and shouldn't be too bad.

This weekend my parents are coming for a visit. We are going to see some family in DC and get a few things while they are here, otherwise we are just going to relax and let them site-see throughout the area and enjoy some time together.

I'm oddly looking forward to getting back to school. I know it will be a lot of work, and it will be different from last year but I'm up for the challenge. Hopefully my kids this year are ready to work with me and put in a good year!

Summer Update!

The end of school was busy but it went well. Both state and final testing went well and the end of the school year closed up well. I was very glad to find out that I will be at only one school next year. It will decrease my driving and my planning a bit as well.

My summer picked up quickly as soon as school ended. I'm working at a day camp program for parks and rec. It's been an interesting job so far. Kindergarten through 5th grade campers each day for at least 6 hours. I've forgotten how needy younger kids are. I've tied more shoes and opened more lunch packaged in the past few weeks than I can remember doing in a very long time. In general it is an okay job. I take kids to the pool, or on field trips once a week, and we play random games or go on the play ground at the school we are at. It's relatively fun, but there are the downsides as well. Plenty of stress to go with it. I probably won't do it again next summer, but for this summer it was worth it.

I was very lucky to have a few days off around the 4th of July to visit my parents at the Jersey Shore and then on to Boston for two friends wedding! I was so glad to get almost a week off to go away with Jason. Being on the beach with my parents and some of their friends was wonderful. I needed the time away and just being able to relax was priceless. Then driving to Boston and being able to see some great friends and witness the beautiful wedding of two good friends was awesome.

I've been home for a week and was back at work. I've put in an application with a new friend on a 2 bedroom/2 bath townhouse. We are hoping to hear back on the place tomorrow so that we can move this coming weekend. I'm not looking forward to packing, moving, or unpacking, but having a bigger place and smaller rent will be very nice. Hopefully everything works out smoothly from here on out!!

This past weekend was my 6th month anniversary with Jason. I know it sounds cheesy but it was a wonderful night to celebrate. We got dressed up and went out to a nice dinner. Then we traded gifts. He gave me two very nice pictures on canvases. One was from the summer camp I used to go to and worked at and the other was from the college I went to. They are gorgeous!

Overall summer has been good so far. I'm looking forward to camp being over and having a few weeks to relax before school starts again.

Doctors Frustrate Me!

After being in pain for so long and dealing with headaches for as long as I have I really should have known better than to walk into a neurologists office with any hope at all. But I was an idiot, and I had hope that the person I was seeing would be knowledgeable and maybe even caring enough to find something, at least the time of day, to listen to what I was dealing with and try to problem solve some way to fix that problem.

Instead I walked into what felt like the most rushed, hyper, and ADHD appointment I've ever had. I felt like I needed to ask the doctor to calm down and take a breath. I was lucky if I could finish my sentence before he tried asking another question which was basically just repeating what I had just answered and had given him documentation of and was right in front of him. I'm really not trying to be a pessimistic jerk and I'm not trying to give this doctor a hard time but I did not feel like I was given the time of day, let alone adequate care.

The decision, up my dosage of one of the meds that I'm already on. Yep, the one that makes me not feel hungry and that I've been on a higher dose of before. Well, we can see if it helps my daily headaches but he even admitted it wouldn't touch the pain I'm in now. So at the end of the appointment when I finally pleaded with him, telling him I've been in extreme pain for 3 weeks now and I can't function or handle this any longer he basically told me that he didn't have many options for me. If it had been earlier in the "headache cycle" he would have considered putting me in the hospital for a few days and putting me on high dose drugs but because it has been so long he things I'd just be miserable in there and that it isn't worth my time. And my other option was to call two other doctors and talk to them about Occipital Nerve Blocks. He looked at me, almost hopefully, that I would just call them and try it. So I said I would and left. He did prescribe me an antihistamine that he thought might help, but is doubtful about as well. UGH!

So I called the two doctors he recommended for the other procedure... one is booked until the end of May, the other until July. Awesome....NOT! So I'm still stuck in a crap ton of pain, and really didn't get any help. So I'm stuck. I'm going to call another neurologists office tomorrow and see if I can get in anytime soon or at least talk with one of their doctors and get suggests. If not I might just be stuck going to the ER to see what they can do. I can't keep living in this much pain. I keep coming home feeling like death and just wanted to crash and not have any human interaction. I've been snapping at my students and my coworkers and they don't deserve it. I just feel bad! I can't keep trying to live like this, it isn't really living.

My students are mainly testing tomorrow so my weekend will be full of grading, it should be a blast! I just want to feel better so that maybe, someday I can have a real life again.

Extreme pain, Rushing, and Reviewing

I feel like the month of April has flown by! Somehow spring break ended and school just jumped into high gear. My algebra classes are now in two different places because the two different schools take the exams two weeks apart from each other. For the past few weeks they have been on the same schedule, but starting this week, until the end of the year, they will be doing different things, which means more planning for me and more balancing so that I know what day it is and what the heck I need to be doing. It should be interesting for sure.

The past few weeks at school have been full of teaching every last minute item under the sun! I think I relearned statistics in order to teach it. Some of the stuff they are expected to learn in Algebra 1 I didn't learn until AP stats, or at all, in all of my math classes, so it made for an interesting few weeks.

And then my head decided it would be a good time to attack me, literally. Starting a little over 2 weeks ago I got a migraine, that didn't go away, despite everything I tried. I'm at the point where I can handle pain. I've had a headache every day for 8 years now, this isn't anything new. But when it is a full blown migraine I take my meds, try to sleep it off and want to avoid any light or sound for a while. That is a very hard thing to do when you teach high school and are surrounded by fluorescent lights and loud children. So I spent the first weekend taking my normal medicine, getting as much sleep as possible, doing as little work as I could get away with, and being an overall bum. And when that didn't work I went to work on Monday and taught as if nothing was wrong. I spent a week trying to pretend that I was fine. I tried stronger medicine and when that didn't work I got a little worried but knew I had one more trick up my sleeve. So over last weekend, I took stuff stronger than morphine, granted it was a few years old, but this is strong stuff. It still had a bit of an effect on me. I was a bit out of it, not functioning well, but still in pain. It dulled the pain enough that I had one normal night, and then it came back. So I had another horrible week. What most people don't understand about being a teacher is that when you don't feel well and you take a sick day, there are 60 kids wondering where you are, needing questions answered and expecting you to be there to teach a lesson. So a sick day, especially this close to state tests, was out of the question. So I dealt with the pain and got through it. Thursday I finally gave in and went to see my doctor. I knew I had a neurologist appointment for next week, but figured I would tried my normal doctors office. Well, after having to wait for an hour just to be seen (despite having an appointment) the doctor I saw basically told me that there wasn't much they could do outpatient and I'd have to try to get in to see my neurologist sooner (good luck) or go to the ER. He gave me one thing to try (which didn't work in the past) and sent me on my way. So I'm now on another medicine for a week, that has annoying side effects, that is slightly dulling the pain but is not really helping. Overall I'm still in extreme pain and I can't do anything about it. I don't go to the neurologist until Thursday, and even then I'm not sure what he's going to tell me. I'm worried that he's going to send me to the ER and tell me I need an inpatient treatment, or IV painkillers. Both options do not fit into my schedule or life right now. Do I want the pain to end? Of course! But I don't have time to sit in the hospital either!

I am so exhausted from being in pain. I come home every night and just crash. I try to get as much work done at school as I can so that I don't have much to do at home. I can't seem to find the energy to grade or plan once I'm home because all I want to do is sleep. Just moving hurts and having to pretend that everything is okay at school makes it that much more draining. As if the pain wasn't bad enough, I have to hide it from most of the people around me just to function. It makes for a very long day.

And now I am done complaining. Given all of the horrible things that have happened this week I shouldn't be focused on me at all. I am so thankful that all of my friends in Boston, and everyone in that area, is safe and sound. It amazes me how much can happen and how quickly events can change.

The next few weeks are going to be as full as the past few. Hopefully they will be less painful and be a tad less stressful. I'm pretty sure that once the state tests are over I will be able to breathe a little bit better. Still have a lot of planning to do, but it will be a bit more relaxed. Thanks to everyone who has read this and is still putting up with me in real life and in cyber space.

Spring Break

Spring Break came at exactly the right time! The two weeks before break were a bit rough. I was dealing with a stressful situation at one of the schools I work at, and it didn't seem to get much better with time. And then I came down with a cold that wasn't bad but enough to knock me out for a day.

Break was amazing! I spent Saturday through Wednesday morning at my parents place in NJ. It was great to see them. I was there for Christmas but it was nice to just be with them (and not surrounded by other family, or family friends) and be able to eat, sleep, and relax. We didn't do much specifically since my parents had work during the week still but it eating home cooked meals was a plus. Not to mention going shopping with Mom for a day and finding some cute spring outfits was definitely fun!

Wednesday I drove up the coast of NJ a bit to see one of my friends from Rochester who now lives in NJ and had the day off. We hung out during the day. I can officially say I went to the beach, even if it was cold. We walked along the boardwalk and saw some of the rebuilding happening from the hurricane. It was a nice afternoon. That night we drove up to Jersey City and met up with two of my other friends who I know from Rochester. I hadn't seen any of them since I moved in August so this was an amazing trip for me. I didn't realize quite how much I missed everyone until we were all back in one room acting as if we hadn't missed a beat. We went into NYC for dinner and drinks and just spent the night catching up and having fun! I was reminded what it felt like to jump into a conversation and feel safe and comfortable from the beginning. I got so many hugs in an 18 hour period it was both comforting and a little saddening that things are so different here.

Thursday I drove home and crashed! I was exhausted. Who knew vacation could be so tiring?! I spent most of the day doing laundry and unpacking and that night I saw Jason (my boyfriend) and we just relaxed together. It was really good to see him again, even if it had only been 5 days since I had seen him, it felt like longer and I missed being able to tell him about my days in person.

Friday I had an interview for a summer camp position. It sounded pretty positive so I'm hoping that means I have a summer job! A little extra pocket money plus fun with kids never hurt anyone! The rest of the day I ran errands, did a little school work, got a haircut, and relaxed at night.

Saturday my head decided to attack me. I have been rather lucky lately and it hasn't been too bad. I've had a few days that have been worse than normal but they've been bearable. Saturday was like that, but when I woke up I didn't want to move, which made the rest of the day difficult. A bunch of Jason's friends were going into DC for lunch, to see some of the museums, and to enjoy the nice weather and he wanted me to come as well. So I did... and it was fun.

I'm still really skeptical about hanging out with his friends. They are very nice people, don't get me wrong, I just feel very out of place. They've grown up together, so whenever I'm with them I feel like an outsider looking in waiting for the inside joke or the story to be explained. I'm starting to get used to it. I just know that no matter what they will always be his friends and while I might end up being called a friend it won't be the same, or even close. I guess it shouldn't be, I'm just having a hard time putting things together in my head, especially after spending time with good friends this past week, and after being consistently told that "I think you'll really get along" or "you guys will be good friends."

Anyway, Sunday was Easter. I just graded papers and went grocery shopping. I did figure out that the best time to go grocery shopping was on a holiday at night! Wow was it dead! It was a busy but productive afternoon/evening.

I'm sad to see break over. Today we had a teacher workday, so it was finalizing grades for the 3rd quarter and then planning for 4th quarter. I can't believe I only have 9 more weeks in my 1st year teacher! It flew by!!! I'm hoping and praying that everything at school starts off a little bit smoother than how it ended before break. I would really prefer less stress for at least a week or two if possible.

Factoring "Hell", Different Pain, and Learning to be Social

I had forgotten how difficult it was to learn how to factor. Granted, for me it just kind of clicked when I learned it because that's how my mind works. But for the kids I am teaching, well let's just say that the majority of the time that is just not the case. I'm not sure why it is so hard to multiply and add, or for that matter know your multiplication facts at all, but it is! I've spent the past few weeks teaching, and reteaching, and reviewing how to factor (and add, subtract, and multiply polynomials). Their test is tomorrow and Monday and I'm slightly worried (actually terrified). There are a handful of kids that just shut down and decided not to do homework, or try at all, which meant they didn't get the much needed practice in. We'll see what happens!

Well I had a migraine this past weekend that decided to stick around for two days, despite medicine. That was not fun, especially because I was trying to be social and actually be a normal human being (more to come on that front). The pain was a reminder of how much worse it can get compared to the daily dull agony of normal life. 

The past two days of physical therapy have been a little rough. I realized how out of shape I was!! My physical therapist had me work balance on my "bad" leg for a while, which wasn't a problem since I can still stabilize pretty well. But then he decided squats in multiple forms would be a good idea. I understand the goal is the build the muscles around what isn't working correctly, but dear lord but the end of yesterday I was sore. I woke up this morning and was still sore and not sure how much I was going to be able to do today. I got through school and went to my appointment. I got through the warm-up, stretching, and balance exercises, I got through 3 sets of squats, but when I had to start doing a modified lunge I lost it! I was on my second set when my muscles started shaking and he realized I had to stop. It was sad!! Granted my hip and side of my leg were killing me, but my quads in general were just sore. Not a fun time. So then he manually worked the muscles that are not right, and now I'm bruised because they were/are so messed up he had to press so hard!! I wish I knew why my body was so messed up and how to fix it without causing more pain!

Learning to be social is an ongoing (and difficult) process for me. You'd think by the time I am 26 I'd feel comfortable meeting people and being around groups of people, but it is still something that I struggle with. I've gotten significantly better, especially since moving, but it is still hard. This past weekend I met my boyfriend's best friend and his wife and then spent the day hanging out with a handful of his closest friends (all with a migraine). It was a lot of fun. We got lunch, saw a movie, hung out at one of the guys places and then got dinner and hung out at his place a bit longer. It was a fun time and I enjoyed spending time with everyone. It was nice to get to know people a little bit better, despite being terrified. I'm not sure if I'm more on edge because of the implications associated with the people I'm meeting/hanging out with or if it is just because I don't know them well, but it was just hard. Not to mention being in extreme pain, super sensitive to light and sound, and not showing it to people is a lot of fun! NOT! It's difficult to hide and I'm sure I was acting differently than I would have normally, which annoys me a bit. 

The next day I was still in pain but had a lazy day and then went out with one of my friends and her boyfriend which was a bit easier for me because I knew them and had been out with them. I'm really just hoping that it gets easier for me to meet new people and feel comfortable. I might be meeting his Mom and brother this weekend, which makes me super nervous! 

We'll see how it all goes! This weekend holds a bunch of grading for sure! Not sure what else is really happening yet. 

School, Valentine's Day, and Pain

The three things in my title are luckily not related at all! I'm sure I could tie them together somehow, but for the most part I try to keep things slightly separate.

School has kept me pretty busy. In Algebra we are on to factoring, which honestly might be the death of me! I didn't realize it would be so difficult to teach, but for some reason adding to one number but multiplying to another is a very difficult concept for students to understand. I think part of why it is so hard for me is that it has been second nature for me for a while so I forgot what it was like to have to learn it. Watching my students go through those struggles reminded me of how painful math can be for some of them and how much they truly dislike it. I'm hoping that some of what is going on in class will stick, at least through exams.

I've had a very relaxing weekend with my boyfriend and Valentine's Day was quite lovely. We celebrated over a few days just because work tends to get in the day of things during the week. Wednesday was our one month, which was just kind of sweet to think about. It shocks me that one month ago I didn't even know him, and now I can't really imagine my life without him. He has been a wonderful addition to my life and makes me smile more than I can even put into words. Alright, I'll stop with all the sappiness! To celebrate Valentine's Day we exchanged presents and then went grocery shopping together and then cooked together. It was a nice way to relax together and share in what tends to be a very one sided individualistic event.

As for pain, well I'm sick of it! This time it's my hip, and according to my physical therapist also my IT bands in my leg. I'm not sure what exactly happened to it, but it's weak and hurts a lot and hasn't gotten better over the past two weeks so the doctor told me physical therapy was next. So I started today and I will be fitting it into my schedule for the next month, twice a week. Not cool! My head has been up and down lately too. I can hide it pretty well and just put up with it, but mix that in with not being able to walk or stand easily and it just makes for very long days.

This week is full of more factoring, speaking at the faculty meeting (oh joy), and normal teaching stuff. I think I am meeting another one of the boys best friends this coming weekend which is slightly terrifying. I'm starting to get better at meeting his friends and/or being around them, but that doesn't mean that its easier for me to think about or actually do.

New Beginnings, Frustrations, and Funny Weather

It has been close to a month since I have written and I feel like a lot has changed in that month. There have been some ups and downs, a few constants, and few new things.

School kept me very busy. After winter break, I was back for a day and then went to a conference, which was packed with good information. Then we had a week before midterm exams. Exam week itself was super productive for me, but just reminded me how frustrating the "two school" situation can be. Having two different grading policies to keep track of and just making sure everything was getting done right at both schools was a little more stressful than I would have liked. This week trying to get grades finished and staying on top of normal planning and teaching I somehow couldn't keep it all together and brought some stuff to the wrong school, or left things at school that needed to come home. It was a bit of a mess and I ended up quite frustrated with myself. Usually I'm much more organized and better about things. Luckily I had planned about a week ahead in lessons during midterm week, so I did have a decent amount done ahead of time and I wasn't working super late all week.

I finally found a dentist and doctor to go to in town. Not that its a huge deal, but given that I've been here about 6 months, it felt like the next step in getting more settled and in making Virginia more of my home.

Towards the beginning of the month I decided to try online dating. It was kind of on a whim and I really wasn't sure what to expect. In all honesty I was kind of terrified of the whole idea of meeting people I had only seen a picture of and possibly talked to a few times online. I had heard good things from a couple friends so I figured it couldn't hurt to try, if nothing else I would meet a few people and talk to them and maybe find some new places in the area to check out. I ended up talking to a handful of guys online, just through messages, and eventually met a couple in person. Talk about being nervous!! It has been a great learning process for me, that is for sure!

I can honestly say that I have met someone who I really enjoy spending time with and who makes me incredibly happy!  We've been going out regularly for 2 weeks now and I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything! He's a great guy and has been able to figure out how to make me smile, get me to talk and feel comfortable opening up about life, and can make me laugh very easily. I feel very lucky to have met him and I'm excited to see what the future holds.

As for the funny weather, well the snow itself isn't funny, it is winter after all. But the fact that we have gotten a 2 hour delay and a 1 hour early release due to what totaled 2 inches of snow just makes me laugh! I'm used to feet of snow during the winter so only getting a dusting is kind of sad for me. I mean don't get me wrong, it makes traveling a lot easier and it has been nice to see it the past few days, but it is hilarious to get out of school due to a dusting! Don't get me wrong, I'll take it!

I'm hoping that the next week at school will go smoothly and that I can get myself back on track with planning and grading. Maybe we'll be lucky and get a full snow day (hey a girl can hope)!

What a Year!!

As I look back on this year I can't believe how much has happened. I have used this blog, and for a while a daily journal to keep track of the big events of life, and for that I'm grateful. This whole year has been full of changes, and a lot of learning experiences, none of which I would change.

Just under a year ago, at the start of 2012, I switched jobs, still working 3 at the same time, but I made a drastic change which was emotional but saved my sanity and in a lot of ways made me a stronger person. I spent the first half of 2012 working those 3 jobs, still regularly feelings stressed, lets face it 50-60 hours of work a week plus taking one grad class will do that. Somehow I managed to balance it, and looking back I'm really not sure how I did it. I lived like that for almost 2 full years but for some reason the beginning of this year (the last 6 months of that lifestyle) were the hardest. I remember telling friends in February/March that if I didn't have a "real" teaching job in the next school year I was going to have to find something different to do because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep living like that. Luckily everything worked out for the best.

I moved to Virginia!! How crazy is that?! When I look back on how the whole process happened, and how quickly I found out and had to make plans to move I'm still shocked it all worked out. I remember being scared, and totally unsure of what to expect. I didn't really think I could move to a completely different state and live on my own, not to mention teach high school math! Needless to say I was doubtful. I can honestly say that I wouldn't trade it for the world! I'm truly happy here, with the friends I've made, with the job I have, and with where I am living.

I learned the value of spending time and being in contact with people (in person and on the phone/internet in long distance instances). When I was in Rochester still I struggled with the social group I was in. I never quite felt like I fit in. Partly because I didn't have a lot of time to invest into the group and the activities, but also because we were all in different stages of life and I just didn't feel like I was in the right place. During the beginning of the year I learned what quality time meant. Seeking out people that are uplifting, positive, and loving has kept me going. After I moved to Virginia I felt truly alone. It was a terrifying but also wonderful experience. I slowly learned how to rely on myself, and how to truly trust those few people in my life that I've come to rely on for support. And I was lucky enough to meet some great people here. I feel as if I do fit in, at least more so, here. I still try to make time to stay in touch with those that matter to me that are far away, but it is harder than I'd like to admit.

I learned how important family is. Since my parents moved to NJ, I had been living at home in Rochester where I grew up without them, which was just strange. And then I moved and my parents made that process so much easier. I couldn't have done it without them! Now that I'm in Virginia I'm even closer to them, which is nice, plus one set of grandparents are close as well. It has been really good to consistently see family for holidays and be close.

I was reminded how important staying organized and planned is! Working at two different schools and being at a different place each day just means I really need to know what is coming up each day. I joke that I haven't gone to the wrong school yet, but that's only because I have multiple calendars highlighted and I have to consciously think about where to go before I leave my house each day.

Health wise I've had my ups and downs this year. I thought my headaches were more under control but the past few months have been a little worse than the beginning of the year. I'm hoping that in the next few months I can find a new doctor and regain some control. I know that the likelihood of this is slim, but I'm willing to try, or at least have a little bit of hope that it might get better eventually. Although 7 1/2 years proves otherwise. My vitamin b12 level had been giving me some trouble too. I think that is finally under control and back to where it should be, but for a while it way too low which meant that I was significantly more fatigued than I should be. It hasn't been the worst year by any means, and things are definitely looking up. Hopefully this year will continue to get easier, or at least less painful.

The past week and a half have been really good. Spending time at my parents place for Christmas was nice. Being with family was good, but then just having a few days to relax was amazing! Break seemed to fly by. Not quite sure I'm ready to get back to school, but it'll be nice to have a routine again.

I'm looking forward to seeing what this year holds. The changes from this year have been great and I think that this coming year is going to be pretty good as well!

Fighting a cold, lots of baking, and an Ugly Sweater Party

This week felt insanely long. Throughout most of the week I wasn't feeling great. Luckily it just ended up being a cold. I had a few nights of very little sleep which was frustrating to say the least. I was productive at least and ended up making cookies in the middle of the night.

School went well. I had a lot of kids out sick, which is difficult when they need to make up work. I also had a few long days with parent teacher conferences and days with 4 classes in a row.

Friday night I went to the grocery school and then made another cheesecake, and a batch of linzer torte. Then Saturday I made sugar cookies, and mac and cheese, and baked ziti. It was a very productive day. People from both schools and a few other friends came over that evening for an Ugly Sweater Party. It was a lot of fun! It was quite enjoyable to watch everyone interact together.

This week should be pretty typical. Normal teaching and review, with a quiz right before Winter Break. Plus a staff holiday party mid-week to look forward to. Then eventually heading to my parents place for Christmas. It'll be nice to have some time off, that's for sure.

Roller Coaster Week

This week was full of ups and downs. Monday was a pretty normal day. Nothing too out of the ordinary. Tuesday was fine with students, but was stressful after a planning meeting. As much as working with other teachers is great, sometimes trying to balance things at both schools can be difficult when we are in different places in the curriculum. I stayed at school until close to 7pm trying to get caught up on grading. By the time I left I felt like I was in a decent spot.

Wednesday was a very long day. Within 10 minutes of getting there I was asked the question (Which school do I want to be at next year?) I've been dreading for a while, because I don't yet have an answer. I was asked it again later in the day. It just added to the stress of the day.  I had students come in for extra help starting at 8am. Then I taught 4 blocks in a row with the exception of lunch (40 minutes without students from 8-4). Right after that I met with the principal to finally talk about my observation from right before Thanksgiving. The meeting went really well and he was very positive. It was a good conversation and I felt great about the whole experience.

Thursday and Friday were both pretty typical. After school Friday some of us from the math department got together to wrap presents for the family we adopted for Christmas. It was a fun night to hang out together and get into the holiday spirit.

Saturday morning I woke up feeling kind of sick. Just really congested and gross with a worse than normal headache added on top. I made my to-do list for the weekend and it was a little overwhelming. There was a handful of stuff to do for school, and then a lot of stuff I wanted to get done around my apartment and to get ready for the holidays. Between Saturday and Sunday I've gotten almost all of it done, which makes me feel pretty good.

This week I'm giving a test to start off my week, and then it should be business as usual. The other principal said he was going to come in and observe on Friday, so we'll see how that goes. This coming Saturday I'm hosting an ugly sweater party. I'm excited to see who comes and how it goes. Hopefully it's fun!

December already?!

I can't believe it is already December. I think the fact that it isn't really cold and I haven't seen snow yet is throwing me off a little bit. It feels weird to be getting ready for Christmas and not have snow everywhere. It is kind of nice not to have to drive through it though.

This week was pretty good. Nothing too out of the ordinary. There were a few late nights grading, and making sure things were ready for the next day, but for the most part I've been relatively prepared.

This weekend was a blast! Friday evening was the holiday get together for one of the schools. We were up at a beautiful winery relaxing and enjoying each others company. After that I went out with a few people from the other school. It was a late, but very fun night!

I've decided that as much of a hassle working at schools is, it has given me the great opportunity of meeting some great people. I've made some good friends and I think it would have been a lot different had I only been at one school.

Saturday I was slightly productive, and did a little bit of decorating, and made some brownies. That night I went to a friends house warming party with some great people! Another fun night for sure.

Today I graded a bit, and did some laundry and just tried to relax a bit. My headache has been ridiculous since Thursday night. I was super bad all day Friday and still not great Saturday. I did my best to ignore it and work through it. I'm grateful for medicine that takes the edge off, and drinks that will help relax me and take some of the pain away. Luckily today was a little bit better, but these are getting difficult to deal with regularly. I know it's life, but it's annoying.

This coming week should be pretty normal. Starting the week off with quizzes and going from there. We'll see how it all goes.

Thanksgiving and a Weekend Away

The short week at school was quite enjoyable. Only 2 days of classes, and I gave tests in every class so it made for a very easy week. It did make for a couple late nights grading, just so I wouldn't have to do too much at my parents house over the weekend, but I'd rather plan and grade at school/home than when surrounded by family.

Wednesday morning I drove to my parents place and made it in just about 3 hours which was quite nice. There wasn't too much traffic, just a normal amount of congestion to keep everything steady. By the time I got to my parents place my Mom's parents were there already, they had gotten in Tuesday from Georgia. My Dad and grandfather were at the airport picking up my brother but my Mom and grandma were at home so I hung out with them for a bit. Once all the boys got home we had lunch. It was good to see everyone. I hadn't seen my grandparents in a few years, and it had been a few months since I had seen my brother. After lunch I got my hair cut at the place where my mom gets hers done. Once we got home after that we had dinner with some of my parents friends, and after dinner my aunt and uncle got in. We had a full house for sure.

Thursday was busy. My grandparents get up early (3am early) so we were lucky to sleep in until 7:30-8. We had "Grandma's Waffles" which is our family tradition of homemade waffles with vanilla ice cream and strawberries on top, for breakfast. They are delicious and my brother and I would try to make anything a holiday just in order to have them for breakfast. Once we all ate more than we should just for breakfast, we got dressed and relaxed around the house. In the afternoon my Dad's parents and brother came over as well. So the house was even fuller for dinner. We had both sets of grandparents, 2 uncles (both named Mike), an aunt, plus my parents and brother. Dinner was amazing!! My parents make some of the best food ever! I may be biased, but my Mom makes gluten free food that tastes delicious, and I've always tried to cook like my parents! We had all of the regular Thanksgiving foods, and my Mom even made gluten free stuffing! My favorite!! We have gluten free pies and carrot cake too! I always gain weight when I go to parents place just because they feed me so well. We spent the rest of the night just vegging out watching football! It was wonderful!

Friday my grandparents left in the morning to go back to Georgia. After my parents left to bring them back to the airport, I got some grading done and the rest of us got breakfast and ready for the day. Once my parents got back, my mom, brother, aunt, uncle, and I went out shopping. We found a bunch of stuff with some great sales. We had another great dinner and just vegged out again at night. It was a relaxing day.

Saturday my aunt and uncle left, and then my brother and dad went to the casino with my grandfather for a little while before my brother flew out. My Mom and I did a little more shopping and relaxing around the house. It was a good day, nice to be out and about and not have a lot of structure.

Today I drove home, made it in 3 hours again which was a little surprising given that it was a holiday weekend, but the traffic wasn't too bad at any point. I got home and was super productive. I did lots of laundry, finished planning for tomorrow, did dishes, and cleaned up around my apartment a bit. I even did a little bit to get ready for Christmas (making my card list, and decorating). It felt like a very productive afternoon which was helpful after not getting a lot done personally this weekend.

This week I've got a decent amount of planning to still do and will have to do some grading as well. I think the principal at the other school wants to observe me at some point this week, so I'll have that to contend with. We have a meeting/conference for new teachers this week which should be interesting. Another busy week as always, but hopefully a good one!

Busy Week, Wonderful Weekend, Reflecting on being Thankful

This week had a lot going on. I planned ahead a little bit for school and then towards the end of the week certain classes were further ahead than others so there were multiple plans in my head. On top of that I found out that my first formal observation by the principal was going to be Friday during my team taught class, when my team teacher was going to be out. The lesson ended up going well, my students were almost silent, not even answering some of my questions which was weird because I knew they knew the answers. When they did an activity they were a bit more rambunctious which was good and bad. We'll see, I'll find out soon what the principal thought of it all.

This weekend was full of shenanigans. It was awesome!! I really did have a blast! Friday I went out with a few people and then some of them came back here to play a board game called Quelf and just hang out. Saturday afternoon I had to take another certification exam. Since it was on the computer I found out my score immediately. I passed with plenty of room so that was very nice. That night I went to a friends birthday party. It was a long night, but a great time!

This coming week is only 2 days of school and then I'm heading to my parents place in NJ for Thanksgiving. Both school days are full of giving tests, which means a lot of grading for me, but it also means that there is less work during those days specifically.

Thanksgiving always makes me quite reflective and with all of the changes in my life lately (well the past few months) there are so many things I am thankful for.
- My job here is awesome! As much as switching between the two schools is tricky and it is a learning curve, I truly love what I'm doing. The kids are great and they teach me a lot. My coworkers and new friends are wonderful, honestly I wouldn't be able to do what I'm doing without all of their help!
- My new friends here! My biggest fear moving was about making friends and meeting people. I've gotten really lucky. I have met some truly wonderful, amazing people and I haven't felt so loved in a very long time. I feel safe, happy and emotionally healthy.
-My friends far away. I miss you all, but the fact that we are able to try to stay in touch makes me very happy. It is hard but cards, emails, and texts are always a plus!
- Family! Now that I live a little bit closer to my parents and one set of my grandparents its nice to be closer with them. Not to mention I can have real conversations with my parents now instead of just being lectured about life. It's great.
- This move in general. I am so thankful for this change. It is nice to finally have a grown up job, but to have escaped some of the drama from home has been good. Not to mention I've matured and actually grown up and allowed myself to stop feeling guilty for acting like that.
-I'm very thankful for my health. Even with my b12 level being screwed up and my headaches being worse than usual lately, I'm still a lot better than I could be and I have been in the past. All of these struggles have taught me a lot and I'm hoping to keep learning and to stop being so frustrated about the constant pain. That is a hard thing to do, and I'm working on it, but for now I just need to be thankful for what I do have.
- I'm thankful for the life I live. I hope to keep growing and learning from everything and everyone around me.

  

Teacher Work Days, Normal Classes, and Girls Night

This week was short for the kids, but a full week for teachers. It was nice to have two days to get work done. Monday was full of parent teacher conferences at both schools. I started at one school early, and met with a few parents and then went straight to the other school where I met with a handful of other parents and trying to get some work done at the same time. Most of my meetings with parents went well, only one was a little confrontational. Tuesday were a few more meetings in the morning and then almost a whole day of grading and planning. I got a decent amount done, planned almost through this coming week, which felt good.

The rest of the week was pretty normal. My head was still "attacking" me most of the week. It wasn't getting back to a normal pain level for more than a few hours at a time which made it a difficult week to get through. Most of my classes were taking a test so the week was pretty easy overall.

Friday night I went out to dinner with a friend and just had a lazy night. I was in a severe amount of pain and wanted to curl up in a ball for most of the afternoon. On my way home from school my back car windows decided to go down and not come back up and I couldn't pull them up all the way. It was a complete mess! Saturday was girls night with my friends. I did almost nothing during the day. I made brownies, did laundry and cleaned up around my house a little before taking an unintentional nap on my couch. Then I went over to my friends house and met up with the girls for dinner, drinks and board games! We played Quelf, and a game where you had to answer the questions wrong in order to win. It was a really fun night and thankfully I was feeling a little bit better compared to the past few days.

Today I made up for my laziness and had a very productive day. We got up at 7, got breakfast, and fixed my car windows (or at least made it so I can drive with them), and then I came home around 10:30. I studied for my next certification exam which is weekend, and then ran a bunch of errands, finished up some school work and planning, and then had a good dinner and talked to a friend from home for a while. Then I just crashed and vegged out. I got most of the things on my immediate to do list done and it felt quite productive. My head is still bothering me more than I'd like it to. I really wish it would just go back to "normal" pain. Eventually I'm going to need to find a doctor here, I was just hoping I'd have some time. Oh well, life happens.

This week should be pretty normal. Just school as normal and then my certification exam on Saturday afternoon and hopefully something fun with friends that weekend as well.

Short, Full, Painful Week/Weekend

So much happened! Even though we only had a 3 day week at school because of Sandy, everything felt off all week! Each day was pretty typical, reviewing material and then taking pretty comprehensive quizzes on lots of material. Friday was the end of the first quarter for there was a lot for the students to finish up.

I was starting to stress out a bit with my test on Saturday, and figuring out grades for the end of the quarter, especially with there being a decent amount of differences between the two schools that I'm still trying to keep straight.

Then I woke up at 3am Friday with a horrible migraine. I immediately took all of my medicine and tried to sleep again. Which of course didn't really work. I eventually fell back asleep and got a few more hours before getting up to go to school. Usually teaching with my normal headache isn't a big deal. With a migraine is doable, not enjoyable, but I can handle it. Friday was miserable! My medicine was still wearing off when I was coming into work so I felt groggy, but being sensitive to light and sound is not helpful in a high school, not to mention extreme pain. I ended up skipping the pep rally at the end of the day and just helped out another teacher by watching one of her students take a quiz. I wasn't going to be able to handle sitting in the gym with all of the students. I felt horrible for not being able to fully do my job, but it was as much as I could. I was hoping that if I had a good dinner, took some more medicine, and slept well it would go away and I'd feel better in the morning. I did all of that, woke up in the middle of the night to take more medicine, and lost a few hours of sleep in the middle of the night, and then woke up to take my exam. And I was still in significantly more pain than I would wish on anyone. Taking an exam in that much pain is never fun!

Holy moly that exam was difficult!! I walked in feeling pretty confident with what I knew. I walked out not being sure if I passed or not. There were a few questions that I had absolutely no clue how to answer at all. At the end I ran out of time to even fill bubbles in on the answer sheet. We'll see, it's going to be close.

After the exam I ran errands and then came home and just vegged out on the couch. One of my friends came over and we watched a few movies and played a game and had dinner, drinks, and dessert, and just enjoyed our night. We both wanted a low key night, and it's exactly what we had! I was hoping that maybe the drinks would help my head instead of my medicine for the night, and it took the edge off enough that I could sleep, but I woke up still in a massive amount of pain.

So I gave in. I did a little bit of grading this morning and realized that I was in too much pain to function and that if this continued (like it has before for weeks on end) that I wouldn't be able to make it through the busy week. I broke down and took the really strong medicine I have. I don't like it because of how strong it is, and how much it effects me, but it has been the only thing to break week long migraines in the past for me. So far I've been in significantly less pain today. I spent most of the day on the couch not able to do much of anything. Hopefully by the time I wake up tomorrow it'll be back to "normal" pain.

This week is going to be busy. We have teacher work days Monday and Tuesday to do parent teacher conferences and get report cards and grading done.Then it is a normal three days of class. I just have a lot of back and forth to do between the two schools and a lot of policies and differences to keep straight. If I can keep it all together until Wednesday I should be good.

Surprises for Mom and Sandy

The past week has been busy as always. Lots of planning and grading. A few late nights making sure I was ready for the next few days. I was observed by my lead mentor and my instructional coach during the same period on the same day. One left and the other came in a few minutes later. It ended up going pretty well, despite the fact that I was quizzing and had to teach quickly. The comments were good so I felt good about that.

This past weekend I drove to my parents in NJ to surprise my Mom for her birthday. It was a lot of fun. Her birthday is today but my Dad planned a nice dinner with a bunch of their friends for Saturday night. I drove in Friday night and met a couple of their friends at a restaurant and made it there before my parents did. The look on my Mom's face was wonderful! The weekend moved fast. We did a little shopping Saturday afternoon and then had the surprise dinner at night. Sunday morning I left around 11 to try to get out before the weather got too bad.

Hurricane Sandy left us we two days off of school. We got hit with a lot wind and rain but I've still got power and it hasn't been too bad. The time off was nice. I was able to finish grading papers, make bbq sauce and sugar cookies and study for my certification exams a bit. My parents in NJ had more wind and rain than we did here in VA but last time I talked to them they still had power but had a few leaks as well. There is snow falling in West Virginia just a little ways away from here. This is just crazy! Weather changes do make my headaches worse. It's been a rough few days, luckily having some time off has given me a break. It's been nice to not have to work through the pain but it's still never fun to have to have to deal with it.

The rest of this week will be a bunch of quizzing, reviewing, and testing since it is the end of the quarter. It will be interesting for sure! Having a short week will be nice.

Where has all the time gone?!

So much has happened in the past few weeks. Most of it has been really enjoyable, I've learned from a lot of things, and I found that sometimes you just have to stress out for a few minutes and take a deep breath before moving on.

Columbus Day weekend at the beach with my girlfriends was awesome!! We all needed some time away from home and away from school. We drove down Friday night and Saturday we spent relaxing! It was sunny and kind of warm so we walked along the beach and sat outside as much as possible. Sunday was rainy and cold so we were productive and got some grading done before we relaxed in the afternoon and then went out for fun at night! We came home Monday and then I had to get ready for the week ahead. All in all it was an amazing weekend!

The next week went pretty well. It felt long for only being 4 days long but nothing too out of the ordinary happened. I remember the days themselves feeling busy.

That weekend one of my friends from home came to visit me here. It was an interesting weekend since he was on crutches and couldn't walk much so our options were slightly limited but we still found things to do. It was good to see a familiar face. I realized that I don't know the area very well, just the few places that I always go but not much beyond that. It was nice to play host, even if it was an odd weekend.

This week was first time that I truly felt stressed by being in two different schools on different days. It was homecoming week at both schools. We had spirit days to dress up for each day, but they were different for each school, so knowing what to wear each day when I woke up was a challenge on its own. On top of that my planning seemed to be lacking and a tad behind the curve of where I would like it to be. I kept feeling like whenever I made it to the correct school in the morning half the battle had been won, but that I still had no clue if the schedule was different (the PSAT's were also given this week, and we had a pep rally) or if my students would be able to focus on the material past despite everything else going on. I just felt on edge all week with school related activities. We did have one really fun activity... faculty flash mob in the pep rally on Friday!!

Every night I came home and just collapsed. It was nice to relax, although some nights I still had school work. Or I was studying for the certification exam that I have to take in a few weeks. One night I had some fun, which was then crushed by a difficult conversation with another friend. Life really is a balance and you can never expect anything to last. I've been reminded that the simple things really are most important!

Friday night I went to the homecoming football game with a few friends. Luckily the team won so everyone was quite happy. Saturday I went to chaperon the homecoming dance. What an interesting experience! Just taking the tickets in the beginning we got to see quite the array of outfits. My goodness dresses have gotten short and heels have gotten high. And girls do not know how to walk in either part of that combination which made if kind of scary and kind of funny! At one points there was a girl who said her friend got hurt on the dance floor so I had to go into the center of the "clump" of kids with a few other teachers looking for the girl. Let's just say that was terrifying and an experience I'd never like to relive!! It was funny as we were walking through, they realized we were teachers and their hands slowly starting coming into sight and and they just stood still and backed away from us. It was a fun night. Afterwards my friend came back to my place and we relaxed together and just enjoyed the night.

This week will be another busy one. We've got 2 weeks until the end of the quarter which means quizzes and grading and plenty of planning! Plus I will be getting observed at least twice within the next two weeks so it'll be interesting for sure.

Manageable Week, Horrible Pain, Long Weekend!

This week felt calmer than last. I have no idea why. Some days I was slightly ahead in planning, others I was just ready as I walked into class. It was a total mixture of things that I just can't explain. For some reason it all seemed to work out well though.

I had my first "lost stuff" scare. I walked into school this morning and had no idea where I left a whole folder worth of graded quizzes and homework. I was almost positive that I hadn't taken it out to work on at the other school, but that is always a possibility, and it wasn't in any of the rooms at that school which meant it had to be at home. It was a terrifying feeling because I couldn't visualize where I had left it. Luckily when I got home this afternoon it was sitting by my desk. I have no idea why it was where it was, but I'm glad I found it all.

The horrible pain came Tuesday. Talk about a weather change! I got home from school on Monday around 5:30 and didn't feel great, just a worse than normal headache, and eating dinner didn't really help, so I crawled into bed at 8 pm. While going to bed extremely early was nice, it was also weird. I guess my body wanted the sleep though. I woke up at 10, rolled over and fell right back to sleep, until I woke up a few minutes after 2 am in the most pain I've been in since the 2 week migraine I had a few months ago. I'm telling you it woke me out of a dead sleep. I went to the bathroom and just turning the light on was enough to make me curl up and feel sick. I immediately took all of my migraine medicines and crawled back into bed. The soft sounds from the air conditioner outside my window sounded like they were blaring, so I put ear plugs in. I haven't been this sensitive to light and sound in years! I mean usually I can function through things, but man am I lucky this happened in the middle of the night! I got a little bit more sleep, just kind of tossed and turned until my alarm went off at 5:30. At that point I wasn't quite as sensitive to light or sound and could function better. I headed into school and somehow made it through the day. I honestly have no idea how I got through the day. I wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep. I would say cry but that makes it worse! To make matters worse I wasn't planned for the next day so I needed to stay and grade and work on plans. I got everything done and made it home by 7:30ish. Boy it was a long, hard day. I would never wish that experience on anyone! To anyone with frequent migraines, I really do feel for you. These experiences remind me how lucky I am to have my daily headaches under some sort of control, even if they are still there, at least I can function.

Today was my first taste of "vacation excitement!" I haven't been so excited to go away in a long time! I felt like a small child counting down the seconds until school was over. Don't get me wrong, little trips to see my parents are great, but I'm spending the whole weekend at the beach with some great girls from work! I feel so lucky to have gotten to know them and joined their group. They are a lot of fun, and we are just planning to hang out and enjoy the long weekend.

All in all it has been a busy week, as always, but a decent one. The weekend should be great! Next week will be busy again even though it is only 4 days, but a friend from home is coming to visit so that will make for another exciting weekend to look forward to!