Thursday I ran a few errands and worked on unpacking the last little bits of things around my apartment. It was good to go out and see a few of the areas around me. Finally being done unpacking made it feel a little more homey, and being able to share pictures of my place with friends online made it feel a bit more real.
Friday I was able to go out and get lunch and wander around a mall with my one friend in the area. She's a good friend from high school. Other than when she helped me unpack the truck, we hadn't seen each other since last summer, but during high school people used to joke that we shared a brain. We easily finished each others sentences and just shared life together. It felt like we picked up right where we left off yesterday which felt amazing. As we were talking we even had a few different experiences which were very similar, it was kind of weird. It was great to spend a few hours out of the apartment with someone so close to me and we even found some great deals! $5 cute Jelly shoes:
Today (and the rest of this weekend) is when things are harder. My friend is out of town on vacation with her family so I don't know anyone here. I've never been very outgoing and I'm not really sure how to change that (any suggestions are welcomed!). I spent today at home. I started to look at my curriculum for school, which was a bit overwhelming. I wanted to try to be productive, but not knowing exactly where to start made it a little hard. I have ideas about some things but we'll see how it all comes together.
Tomorrow I've decided to find a church to try. I looked up a few online and found a couple that I think I'm going to visit in the next few weeks. I've been considering looking for a new church for a while, but I have mixed feelings about it. I've had bad experiences at churches. When I go to a church I'm looking for true community, people to be genuine, for things to not be a show but a real worship experience, and for the experience to be Christ centered. Too many times have I gone into church and found them to be shows set up for people, or just social gatherings that seem to have very little to do with God. I've been hurt before at churches and that is why I'm hesitant to try to go back. On the other hand I know that they can be very powerful places to build relationships and communities, not to mention strengthen my faith. I'm very nervous to go but I also know that I need to get out and see people this weekend and hopefully meet some new people.
I've spent the past few months unhappy with parts of my social situation, and now that I'm out of it, I definitely miss some aspects of it. I'm not sure if I am just missing having people around me or if it is the fact that I miss having options. I know it is important to learn to be okay on my own, and that this week will be a good learning experience for me but I'm not sure exactly how to do it. I definitely miss certain people and while talking with them online and on the phone has kept me sane the past few days it also makes me miss home. I know I have a lot to learn and that it is going to be a bumpy ride. I'm excited for what the next few days will hold. Once orientation starts on Wednesday I know I will at least be able to meet more people and we'll see where it goes from there.
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